How do we come together during shared moments of grief and loss? How do we hold space for each other when our hearts are broken? How do we learn how to bear witness? How can rituals and ceremonies help?
As a grief doula, I create sacred rituals to help the bereaved and the broken-hearted move through their pain intentionally and compassionately. My teacher Megan Sheldon from Be Ceremonial believes we are all ceremonial beings and that we hold ritual in our bones. Learning how to come together to collectively hold space for our pain is an important part of our healing journey.
It’s time reclaim our right to heal!
Grief Rituals
Grief rituals are woven into our grief coaching sessions to support a healthier way of being with your grief. Rituals are deeply personal and are customized based on your intention, life loss, and values. I have supported people through pregnancy loss, divorce, retirement, pet loss, menopause, aging, mental illness, the death of a loved one, and so much more. As you’ll come to learn, rituals are intentional, symbolic actions that support a healthier integration of our life losses. As your guide, I curate grief rituals that help you meet your grief from a place of grace.
“Rituals are about creating meaning in the face of loss. They are a way to say, I’m here, I’m present, and I’m honoring this experience. ”
~ Megan Devine
Engaging in Grief Rituals
Step 1:
We meet to better understand your needs and intention.
Step 2:
We get clear on what matters to you and co-create a ritual.
Step 3:
You engage in this ritual, make observations in your journal and notice what arises in your body as you bring intention to your experience.
Step 4:
We meet to review what you experienced and decide on next steps.
Grief Ceremonies
Grief ceremonies invite us to cross a threshold, honoring what was, attending to what is, and preparing for what will be. These ceremonies can be done on your own, within a small group or with larger communities. A ceremony will help to create shared meaning, often granting us permission to speak about what has remained unspoken and unacknowledged. I have held ceremonies for Olympians, executive leaders, communities, and families who were longing to consciously complete their journey together as a reflection of their shared love.
As your guide, I help you design a symbolic ceremony that will honour your experience, commune with others, and help you move through your loss in a healthy way.
“We do spiritual ceremonies as human beings in order to create a safe resting place for our most complicated feelings of joy or trauma, so that we don’t have to haul those feelings around with us forever, weighing us down. We all need such places of ritual safekeeping. And I do believe that if your culture or tradition doesn’t have the specific ritual you are craving, then you are absolutely permitted to make up a ceremony of your own devising, fixing your own broken-down emotional systems with all the do-it-yourself resourcefulness of a generous plumber/poet.”
~ Elizabeth Gilbert
Hosting a Grief Ceremony
Step 1:
We meet to go over your intention for the ceremony. This includes giving consideration to who will be in attendance, what key features feel important to incorporate, when and where the ceremony should be held, and any other important details.
Step 2:
I support you in crafting an invitation that you will send out. In addition, I invite you to begin preparing for the celebration in advance of the gathering through reflection and guided questions. I will guide you every step of the way so that this experience feels safe and nurturing.
Step 3:
I will arrive at the location early so that we have a chance to connect and prepare.
Step 4:
Once people have arrived, the ceremony begins. Ceremony often include a combination of the five elements (earth, water, fire, air, and ether) offering us important ways to connect with our senses, emotions and values.
Step 5:
As the ceremony comes to an end, we conclude our gathering in a way that feels right for you. This might include music, food, and other ways to help us transition from this sacred space.
Step 6:
I meet with you following the ceremony to express gratitude and to support you in consciously completing this important milestone.